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tiffanywint
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 12:34 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 12:40 pm

Ahhhh Ambler. We don't all live in your world.





;)
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 12:42 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 12:46 pm

My pointy ears and aversion to kryptonite are proof of the fact.
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 12:49 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 12:54 pm

Of course not. Never any further north than Peterborough, and that was under protest.
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 1:15 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 1:49 pm

We know.
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tiffanywint
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 7:14 pm

Monogamy is great for a couple that is in love. And it can work in other relationships just to keep things sane, but otherwise no, its unnatural, IM oh-so HO of course.
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 7:39 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 7:46 pm

There are reasons why people cheat outside the urge to self destruct, you know.
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 7:53 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 8:17 pm

We all cheat in our heads. In many cases that stops us from needing to cheat in real life, no? In my head I eat cheesecake for breakfast, chocolate for lunch and ice-cream for dinner, loads of it. Doesn't mean I would or even really want to in real life. There's an awful lot of shit in my head, and having the occasional fantasy about, er, Sharky ;) , does not make my relationship bankrupt. And I'm not sure when anyone brought moral superiority into it. Personally I'm not particularly interested in being morally superior and it's the least of my reasons for not cheating.
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 8:35 pm

The reasons for the high percentage of divorce shows you that today people are way too selfish to chose a mate for life, so monogamy seems to become less wanted. Or is it that we life too long, have too much spare time on our hands, are shown too much sexuality and beautifull people through massmedia, do not want to enjoy the same thing for a too long a period at the time?

For the last 11 years I have been rather monogamous but have met some folks I would not have minded to have a roll in the hey with. The fact this did not happen is due to the lack of mutual attraction and a certain defensiveness on my part that protects my life with my family rather than enjoy a quick or long nigth of lust.
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 8:38 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 8:44 pm

Don't worry sweetheart. While he's hurt that you messed him around before, Sharky told me he'd be prepared to give you another chance ;) .
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 8:48 pm

Sharky's foolish like that. I'll prep the cellar.
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySat Oct 27, 2012 11:36 pm

I'd have to weigh fear of commitment against fear of intimacy - it takes me a long time to trust anyone, particularly men, so psychologically, monogamy suits me perfectly. I invest time in getting to know someone; I take a risk in trusting them when I'm at my most vulnerable - it's not something I want to go through too many times.

Whether monogamy is 'natural' or not is probably based on individuals, in that case. Logically, I'd say monogamy isn't necessarily 'natural', although in terms of child-rearing it has advantages.
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySun Oct 28, 2012 10:08 am

Isn't this really about two very different things that can be at odds with each other?
Monogamy makes perfect sense in terms of building a strong relationship with a "life partner", if you will.
People who say that monogamy is unnatural actually mean that it's not natural for your lust to be limited to just that person, which is of course completely accurate. But I do believe a person can be emotionally satisfied by one "other".

Perhaps the ideal is indeed an open relationship, but both partners have to be pretty strong emotionally for that, and convinced of their commitment to each other. I doubt it's something that could work for just everyone.

Speaking from a personal perspective, I do think it would bother me more if my significant other was constantly pining for someone else but never acting on it rather than engaging in a one-night stand he then completely forgot about. It's quite obvious that the former is more of a symptom that your relationship is seriously ill.
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySun Oct 28, 2012 10:11 am

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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptySun Oct 28, 2012 2:18 pm

Erica Ambler wrote:
It is perhaps unfair to expect all our different needs and desires to be met by just one person.

Like finding a possible soul mate who does almost everything right but falls short in bed, and you keep thinking about one of your exes who did, and call him up, meet him, use him....and feel guilty after....

And you thought only M had skeletons in the closet.

I never told him cuz I didn't want to hurt him, and instead let him down gently....and moved on...dated another guy who wouldn't leave me alone and it was worse for him...we walked down the aisle together...



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tiffanywint
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptyMon Oct 29, 2012 6:51 am

Having settled comfortably into middle age, even this monogamy sounds like a lot of work. It's time to find a nice woman with grown kids that don't ask to borrow one's car. Preferably a school teacher with a pension and we can monogamy once a month or so, until I expire of heart attack, preferably on the golf course. Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 3012860531
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptyMon Oct 29, 2012 12:19 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptyMon Oct 29, 2012 8:27 pm

Erica Ambler wrote:
When I reach that stage take me out and shoot me.

Once a month, even twice is manageable. No need to shoot. Just do your best. Sit-ups help. Although 40 plus women are maneaters. They are like tigers. Voracious doesn't begin to describe. I can see why some guys might tip the pool-boy to help. Taming techniques need be developed. Golf course can offer safe respite, as well as any televised sporting event with the sound turned up loud.
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PostSubject: Re: Tsdfghjkl;   Tsdfghjkl; - Page 2 EmptyMon Oct 29, 2012 9:33 pm

Erica Ambler wrote:
When I reach that stage take me out and shoot me.

Go out in a blaze of glory...like M.... :face:
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