These forums may contain mild adult content and are not associated with EON, Sony or any other companies and do not reflect their views.
 
HomeHome  RegisterRegister  Log in  

Share | 
 

 The clouds are here - the bad day thread.

View previous topic View next topic Go down 
Go to page : Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 ... 10, 11, 12  Next
AuthorMessage
Salomé
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 2107
Member Since : 2011-03-17

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Fri Oct 14, 2011 11:39 pm

Erica Ambler wrote:
Blunt Instrument wrote:
it's truly fantastic to be held in high regard by others. :)

Don't want to rain on your parade, Blunt, but Rave and Oppers hold all Baker Street's clients like that. They've no wish to be sent back to Ploiești.

It's always a bit sad when they start to sob...
Back to top Go down
Gravity's Silhouette
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 3854
Member Since : 2011-04-16
Location : Inside my safe space

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sat Oct 15, 2011 4:41 am

Very sorry to hear about the family losses to Blunt Instrument and White Tuxedo. I wish I had something more profound to say, but sometimes with losses like these there really aren't any words. Just hope BI and WT feel better soon.
Back to top Go down
tiffanywint
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 3675
Member Since : 2011-03-17
Location : making mudpies

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sat Oct 15, 2011 5:02 am

Sad to hear about your dad BI and your Mom Tux. Sincerest condolences to both of you.
Back to top Go down
Ravenstone
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 1471
Member Since : 2011-03-17
Location : The Gates of Horn and Ivory

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sat Oct 15, 2011 6:45 am

Salomé wrote:


It's always a bit sad when they start to sob...

I consider that a perk
Back to top Go down
The White Tuxedo
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 6062
Member Since : 2011-03-14
Location : ELdorado 5-9970

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sat Oct 15, 2011 8:29 am

She'll be cremated today or tomorrow. She did always complain of being cold. Wish she were around so I could tell her that.

It still hasn't sunk in. I still catch myself thinking of calling her to tell her something. I haven't been over to her house again, since she was found. It's when I fill out forms concerning her that it starts to settle in my mind that she is really gone.

For days I've had a movie quote in my mind that I couldn't figure out where it was from. Just remembered, it's from DIAL M FOR MURDER. Bob Cummings tells Grace Kelly that in a few days she'll have the most wonderful breakdown, or something to that effect.
Back to top Go down
tiffanywint
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 3675
Member Since : 2011-03-17
Location : making mudpies

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sat Oct 15, 2011 9:07 am

Tux do you have any family, siblings or father still alive? Or are you handling this alone? Tough either way but just wondering.
Back to top Go down
The White Tuxedo
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 6062
Member Since : 2011-03-14
Location : ELdorado 5-9970

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sat Oct 15, 2011 9:39 am

My parents are long divorced, and all of my mother's family is in Ireland and England. I'm all she had here. So I'm basically handling this on my own. My immediate family (father, stepmom, half-sisters) doesn't seem to give a shit. That's not really true, or fair to them. But it seems that way sometimes.

I've also got to do a major cleanup of her house. She let it go to rot big fucking time, and it'll cost thousands to get it into a condition where I can sell it. I mean I have to get professional cleaning people. I can't and won't clean that shit up. It's awful in there. I'll sift through things to find items of value that are worth saving, but that's it.

It's not that there is trash in there. There really isn't much in the way of anything very gross. It just hasn't been cleaned in a long time. When I was a kid it was very clean, but my mom was downhill for a while.

Ugh, and I'll be in there alone. That freaks me out. Especially going down into the basement.

EDIT ADDON: Some venting going on, pay no mind. I'll get through this. My mother is gone and I have to deal with the major shit storm she left me. There is no will, no insurance, and the house is a god damn mess.

The moral here is to plan for your death. My father now knows that if anything happens I want to be cremated. He doesn't like the idea, which in turn I don't like. I don't want to be dressed in a suit, put in a box, thrown into a hole, and left for the worms. Cremation is far more dignified.
Back to top Go down
Blunt Instrument
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 3139
Member Since : 2011-03-20
Location : Belfast, Northern Ireland

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sat Oct 15, 2011 10:27 am

All the best with sorting everything out, Tux.
Back to top Go down
The White Tuxedo
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 6062
Member Since : 2011-03-14
Location : ELdorado 5-9970

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sat Oct 15, 2011 10:34 am

I may have flown off the handle in that post. Just frustrating is all.
Back to top Go down
tiffanywint
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 3675
Member Since : 2011-03-17
Location : making mudpies

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sat Oct 15, 2011 5:52 pm

The White Tuxedo wrote:
I may have flown off the handle in that post. Just frustrating is all.

Yeah sorry, I thought you might be having to handle this on your own. Oh well, sounds like you are up to the task at least, although it can't be easy. Best with it!

I don't understand opposition to cremation. Its a perfectly dignified way to dispose of remains.
Back to top Go down
Gravity's Silhouette
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 3854
Member Since : 2011-04-16
Location : Inside my safe space

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sat Oct 15, 2011 9:47 pm

tiffanywint wrote:

I don't understand opposition to cremation. Its a perfectly dignified way to dispose of remains.

Agreed. It has been an accepted custom in cultures for millenniums...it is clean and hygienic...it conserves space and resources....it helps reduce the risk of disease spreading....it certainly costs much, much less than a funeral.

Some people's problem with cremation may also come from the fact that there wouldn't be a burial plot to visit and to go speak to loved ones. Some people find it helps to cope with the death by making regular visits to the cemetery, decorating the grave with flowers, and talking to the deceased as if they were still alive. Cremation *feels* much more final than plot burial does. Burial gives the family more time to grieve and transition out of their grief, whereas cremation is sudden.Depending upon the family and the circumstances, cremation may not be the best option. If they have the money to put together a funeral and a memorial tomb, then it may be worth it to the family to have a burial plot, especially if the death was sudden and people didn't get to say goodbye.

One grandmother of mine succumbed to breast cancer over the course of about 20 months, so when she finally passed, we'd all accepted the inevitability that that moment was coming and we were all in agreement about cremation (as was the grandmother). My Grandmother's only request was that only female orderlies of female family members dress her in her cremation gown and we honored that request)
Back to top Go down
Erica Ambler
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 5054
Member Since : 2011-08-05
Location : mis putas tristes

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sun Oct 16, 2011 2:07 am

Greater economy results from burning couples together. Some people object to this practice when the wife is still alive, but I say think of the planet.
Back to top Go down
Largo's Shark
Moderator
Moderator


Posts : 10600
Member Since : 2011-03-14

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sun Oct 16, 2011 2:39 am

I don't want to be cremated. Why? Because I want the my skeleton to remain in a fixed place, where people could pilgrimage to, and pay their respects. The cardboard of the coffin and my decaying organic matter would nourish the soil.

Back to top Go down
Santa
Senior Correspondent
avatar

Posts : 665
Member Since : 2011-08-21

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sun Oct 16, 2011 3:12 am

I don't want to be put in a box in an oven, that's too boring. I want to burn on a pyre in the open, like Darth Vader.
Back to top Go down
The White Tuxedo
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 6062
Member Since : 2011-03-14
Location : ELdorado 5-9970

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sun Oct 16, 2011 6:19 am

Went to her house again. For the first time since she was taken out. It's not so bad, if I get some professionals.

I honestly feel a great relief for her sake. I'm not depressed, I feel like I love life. :)
Back to top Go down
Makeshift Python
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 6800
Member Since : 2011-03-14
Location : Up

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sun Oct 16, 2011 6:31 am

The White Tuxedo wrote:
I feel like I love life. :)
It's a wonderful feeling that. Best to take that and move forward with it.
Back to top Go down
tiffanywint
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 3675
Member Since : 2011-03-17
Location : making mudpies

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sun Oct 16, 2011 6:50 am

Cremation still facilitates visitation. At both Catholic and non-denomenational cementaries here, you can be either cremated or buried and fixed up with either a plot or a space for your urn and plaque in the cremation section. Both options facilitate visitation and placing of flowers etc.Neither option is cheap though. The cemetaries due good business with both their burial and cremation plans.

I've been to my share of catholic funerals. The main difference with cremation is that after the funeral mass, there is no trucking off to the cemetary for the formal burial. The body goes to the crematorium while the rest of us head off to the reception :drunken:
Back to top Go down
Blunt Instrument
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 3139
Member Since : 2011-03-20
Location : Belfast, Northern Ireland

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sun Oct 16, 2011 10:15 am

Dad was cremated, the interring of his ashes into a graveyard will happen on Thursday.
Back to top Go down
The White Tuxedo
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 6062
Member Since : 2011-03-14
Location : ELdorado 5-9970

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Sun Oct 16, 2011 11:31 am

Blunt Instrument wrote:
Dad was cremated, the interring of his ashes into a graveyard will happen on Thursday.

I get my mom's ashes on Monday. Prepared to mail them away. I won't keep any. I just don't like the idea. I have to let go of my mother. Keeping her remains... No.

There may be a memorial in my mom's neighborhood. I think one of the neighbors may have already enlisted a Christian minister who lives in the neighborhood which puts me off because my mother wasn't a religious person. I'm not either, but if she were I'd have no problem with a prayer service. I know she would never like a big thing of people showing off their religion, which some of these neighbors seem to do. This puts me in an awkward spot. I'm fine with an informal service, but I don't want a religious one. I'd rather not have one in Kentucky at all. I don't want to be asked to speak. It's not my way, it wasn't my mother's way. I know she'd rather go out quietly. My fear is that while some of her neighbors are sincere and helped my mom, some of them are two-faced show offs who barely gave a shit about her when she was alive and in need and only helped her to make themselves look good. There's a long history of my mom putting up with shit in that neighborhood. I'd rather spend a little time with the people who were her real friends, and not the assholes coming out of the woodwork.

Sorry, this has become my venting place. I'm just protective of my mother. I don't know what I'll do about a memorial. I want something low key, not dramatic. It's what she would have wanted.

It's struck me how the dead can't speak up. You always hear, "It's what so-and-so would have wanted". I wonder how many times that's bullshit.
Back to top Go down
tiffanywint
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 3675
Member Since : 2011-03-17
Location : making mudpies

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Tue Oct 18, 2011 5:36 am

Tux if you don't like the memorial the neighbors are planning, how about simply not attending and holding one of your own and doing it your way or not holding one at all. You can't really stop them from holding a memorial, just like Michael Jackson's relative's couldn't stop others from having their own memorials to MJ, but you can stay clear and do it your way and invite who you see fit. You can even hand pick who speaks, but then you are stuck with what they might say. Speeches before booze is probably best.
Back to top Go down
The White Tuxedo
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 6062
Member Since : 2011-03-14
Location : ELdorado 5-9970

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Tue Oct 18, 2011 7:01 am

Heh, the neighborhood memorial is barely on my mind these days.

The loss of my mother is settling in, though.
Back to top Go down
lalala2004
Experienced Correspondent
Experienced Correspondent
avatar

Posts : 310
Member Since : 2010-05-15
Location : LaLaLand

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Thu Nov 03, 2011 1:29 pm

So sorry to hear of your loss, Tux. I've been off the radar so much, I'm sorry I didn't express my condolences sooner. Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Back to top Go down
Santa
Senior Correspondent
avatar

Posts : 665
Member Since : 2011-08-21

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Thu Nov 17, 2011 8:50 pm

Hit a wall.
Back to top Go down
Erica Ambler
Chief Executive
Chief Executive
avatar

Posts : 5054
Member Since : 2011-08-05
Location : mis putas tristes

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Thu Nov 17, 2011 11:27 pm

New brakepads.
Back to top Go down
Santa
Senior Correspondent
avatar

Posts : 665
Member Since : 2011-08-21

PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   Thu Nov 17, 2011 11:59 pm

Not that kind of wall.
Back to top Go down
Sponsored content




PostSubject: Re: The clouds are here - the bad day thread.   

Back to top Go down
 
The clouds are here - the bad day thread.
View previous topic View next topic Back to top 
Page 5 of 12Go to page : Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 ... 10, 11, 12  Next

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
Bond And Beyond :: Beyond :: General Discussion-
Jump to: